You may remember that earlier in the week some of us brought in snacks for a team meeting. I brought a bottle of the Baideme Family reserve to share. I forgot about it all week until the Receptionist sent an email this afternoon reminding us to remove all items from the fridge. Thus, with Allie's Birthday Cake Oreos (you read that correctly), Happy Hour at the office began.
With all my free time today, I decided to get a little "poety" with my pic. At every Baideme family reunion, we bottle and cork wine as souvenirs. It's been nearly ten years since the last time I remember participating, and they've invested in some serious corking technology upgrades since then :). I'm definitely glad I was present this year, or I wouldn't have the 2012 variety of the Baideme juice!
It wasn't exactly a short walk to find row #12 on the Baideme Vineyard, but obviously worth it. This weekend the family and I headed out to Westfield, NY to visit Dad's side of the family. Back-to-back reunions with the Mutch and Baideme families meant today was chock full of hugs, baked ziti, and stories that began with "Have I ever told you..."
What's the perfect gift for a unicorn loving wine fiend? I'll tell you: A Screwnicorn. Maybe it's because I'm petty, but I believe there is no elation like that which comes from winning a round of gift giving — when I can honestly say, "Oh em gee... I found the perfect gift for you." Giving Screwnicorn to Tara for her birthday last summer was like delivering a soul to its mate. When Screwnicorn uncorks a bottle, you don't just get wine, you get sparkles and whimsy, glitter and rainbows... and everything else Lisa Frank.
Just look how stoked these fellas are to FINALLY have found Screwnicorn:
As you can tell from the title of this post, this story does not have a happy ending. Still, I feel it's only fair to give you proper warning: Screwnicorn doesn't make it.
Pic #122 - 5/1/12
Screwnicorn during happier times (approximately 3 hours ago).
Sadly, not everyone was impressed with Screwnicorn. Some (Becca) refused to call her by her name, seeing "it" only as a mechanical device made for uncorking alcoholic beverages. Some declined to thank her for her magical twisty powers. Some feel really really badly now.
Here's what happened... in pictures. No reenactment was involved — the images below document real people in real time, with real feelings.
Again with the happier times. Corking wine and eating rainbows.
One Miss Becca Pants giggling, because she knows something the rest of us don't.
"Oh crap - I just killed Screwnicorn."
"I mean, it's not like she didn't have it coming."
Tara's initial grief at the site of clipped Screwnicorn.
Delirious denial.
Final goodbyes. Because, let's be honest — what kind of life can a screwless screwnicorn really lead?
In fairness to Becca, Screwnicorn was not this cork's only victim, leading us to believe her demise was not due to malicious intent, but rather a stubborn cork.
And you thought The Last Unicorn was a sad story. So let this be a lesson to you: Only the good die young. Don't let Becca touch your stuff. Red Leather Yellow Leather. I've got nothing.
Farewell, Screwnicorn. May you rest in sparkly peace forever.
Sketchiest wine tasting ever? Social experiment? Both? I don't know. What I do know is that I walked 5 blocks to find the address after spotting this sign posted on a corner street lamp...and I found no wine.
